"I am relieved, too, Paul. I am glad I'm not pregnant." She looked into his face. "You don't want children, do you?" Whatever gave you that idea?" Do you mean, you do want them?" I don't, don't want them. I know that's not quite the same as wanting them..." He regarded her. "Was that it? Were you thinking you lost your only chance to have my child?" That might've been part of it," she admitted. "That, plus I had just about reconciled myself to the notion of having a child." I think I do want a family. I know there's only one person in the world I'd want to start one with ... and that's you, Shy." Really?" Really. Not now, though. When we're ready." When will we be ready?" she asked."After we graduate and have jobs ... pay down these student loans a bit ... have a home and some security ... are married."She turned to face him. "You think we should get married?" I think that's where we're headed." I think so, too." More tears streamed down her cheeks."Now what's wrong?" I wasn't sure. We crossed over the burnside bridge on our way to the Crystal Palace hotel. Husband made a quick stop in front of the theater, which sat right next to the world famous Voodoo doughnut shop. I had read of their extreme popularity but didn’t expect the line to extend out the door and down the street ending directly in front of the Paris. I knew I was going to have to run that gauntlet of shame in order to enter those dark confines.“Thought seeing this monument to sadistic venality might help get rid of your butterflies,” he smiled devilishly. He was beyond excited, like a little boy on Christmas eve.“I’m fine,” I lied. I was a wreck, soooo needed a drink and a joint.We proceeded to our hotel, just a few, sketchy, six or so blocks from the Paris theater. A walk I was not looking forward to, knowing parts of me would soon be exposed to the sultry summer heat. I had by now become accustomed to the mob mentality, the feeding frenzy, that never failed to materialize whenever I set foot in.
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